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about
This chorus first came to me in an airport in Portugal. After being out of country awhile, I had a friend check up on me, wanting to hang out. My mental health had been so low for such a long time, I felt I had nothing to offer the friendship. I was exhausted from feeling low and worried about coming across like a bummer, the only way I knew to answer was, “I’d love to hang out, but I don’t have much space to dive into anything deep.” I couldn’t bear the thought of breaking into tears again. I finished the song on tour in Redding, CA, on a beautiful porch surrounded by giant trees, and I like to think the arrangement took on some of that character, bringing some of the folk instrumentation back into a record that has mostly left it behind.
lyrics
I’ve learned how to hide inside this dark cafe
Put my headphones on and I stare into space
Wrestling thoughts till they fall into place
And I hope they don’t need and escape
But you’re calling me and you wanna catch up
When I’m short on sleep and I keep getting stuck
On old memories that hit me like a truck
But I can’t keep on pushing my luck
So until I’m better, maybe we could talk about the weather
And you could show me your vacation pictures
I’m talented at staring at the floor
Oh, It’s been a long year
I want to be the person you remember
And try to scratch the surface till it splinters
But I am tied up holding closed the door
Oh, Too tired to cry a minute more
Some days are a knife and they whittle me down
And some are an ocean that tempt me to drown
I know if I’m open, you’ll hate how it sounds
But I’m trying to still stick around
So until I’m better, maybe we could talk about the weather
And you could show me your vacation pictures
I’m talented at staring at the floor
Oh, It’s been a long year
I want to be the person you remember
And try to scratch the surface till it splinters
But I am tied up holding closed the door
Oh, Too tired to cry a minute more
Give me a second, I just need to find that lonely silver lining
Dignity isn’t kind, but I still need to hold it blindly
Til’ I’m better, maybe we could talk about the weather
And you could show me your vacation pictures
I’m talented at staring at the floor
Oh
It’s been a long year
I want to be the person you remember
And try to scratch the surface till it splinters
But I am tied up holding closed the door
Oh
Too tired to cry a minute more
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